Karma?

Today's high: Getting called a "cupcake"

Today's low: Tonight, after giving someone a ride out of my way. Realizing the car is overheating because there is a hole in tube that attaches from the radiator to the the engine. Getting lost, then pulling over next to the Charles River and getting water from a puddle. Really suave. Maybe this whole "being nice" thing is overrated.

I Read Good

Thanks to Dead Serious for tagging me with this book questionnaire and not meme, as Yaron so eloquently points out.

You're stuck inside Fahrenheit 451, which book do you want to be?
I'll have to go with The Little Prince. It's been a favorite of mine since childhood. (I can't believe how many people have not read Fahrenheit 451 but Dead Serious has a good explanation of the meaning: For those who haven't read Bradbury's book, in the novel-world, all books have been destroyed. To insure that these valuable resources survive, members of an underground all "become" books. That is, they memorize them and can recite them to others. Living texts. Neat idea, right?)

Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character?
When i was a teenager, like Karol, i had a crush on Holden Caufield. I actually liked Zooey from Zooey and Franny as well. I get attached to characters pretty quickly but i don't know if i have crushes on them - probably most recent character i felt intensely about was Joe Kavalier from Michael Chabon's The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay. That guy could draw, write comic books, and wanted to kick Hitler's ass - that's pretty hot.

The last book you bought is:
Zen and the Art of Motorcycle by Robert Pirsig
Incidences but Daniil Kharms

The last book you read:
Wonder Boys by Michael Chabon

What are you currently reading?
The Satanic Verses by Salman Rushdie
The Lost Continent: Travels in Small-Town America by Bill Bryson

Five books you would take to a deserted island.
Complete collection of Sherlock Holmes.
The Bible - because well it is The Book.
Beyond Good and Evil by Friedrich Nietzsche
Collection of Charles Simic Poetry
Master and Margarita

Who are you going to pass this stick to (3 persons) and why?
Showercap, because we haven't spoken in a while and i'm sure she will have interesting choices and make it funny as hell.
My Sister cause she's real smart and when i grow up i want to be just like her.
C because, well i want to know what she likes and i want to give her an excuse to post a cliche post without being responsible for it.
Smurfette because that girl hasn't posted in forever.

Ken I Got It Covered This Week

Or, and so the year of the cock continues.

It sucks when i don't have my handy dandy camera on hand.
Seen on the door of a women's bathroom stall*:

I Love COCK
Me TOO
Ya, i love chicken too, YUM.


*Each color represents a different, um, author.

Ugh!

So this morning i found myself awake at seven o'clock! WTF? I must have caught the bug from Writersbloc. I'll have to "thank" her when i see her today.

(Ed. note Just to keep my cool cred, the little story has been removed.)

I can't wait to see Max in NYC (Betya who?) I kid, see you soon lovebirds. (And don't forget the blogger partay!)

Over and out,
me

What Comes To Mind?

Flint, MI, Scruffy Fat Man, Guns, and Banks.
Check out ironies or ironies.

Via: Dead Serious

Ipod Shuffle Set To: A Dirty Mind

via C

Memo to CVS: It's Easter, Get With The Program

So i have to admit that the resurrection of Jesus has little effect on my life. The closest i've come to celebrating Easter was painting Easter eggs with my Catholic best friend in fourth grade. However, there is one reason why i always look forward to Easter: Cadbury Caramel Eggs. I think if i was ever tempted sell my soul to the devil, i'm sure Chocolate Cadbury Eggs would somehow be worked into the deal.
So imagine my horror when i walked into my local CVS only to discover the Cadbury Eggs to be sold out. Not one to be defeated easily i headed over to another CVS only to discover they don't even stock the holy of holies. Later in the week i frequented yet another CVS. As you can guess my quest did not meet a satisfactory end. What kind of Easter is this without my precious. Maybe G-d is punishing me for making all those Immaculate Conception jokes?! I was joking, give me back my precious! (If not G-d than CVS!)

Oh Yoko!

John Lennon used to be my hero. Somewhere between puberty and now i slowly realized that as much as i loved the man's music i couldn't stand the unreal image of the world John so loved to propagate in his music. Maybe because of his unrealistic take on the world that he writes such perfect love songs (that and the man is an incredible musician).

For example a song like Oh Yoko which should feel too private to relate to anyone but Yoko, yet feels so universal.

In the middle of the bath
In the middle of the bath
I call your name
Oh Yoko, oh Yoko,
my love will turn you on
My love will turn you on

In the middle of a shave
In the middle of a shave I call your name
Oh Yoko, oh Yoko, my love will turn you on

In the middle of a dream
In the middle of a dream
I call your name Oh yoko, oh yoko,
my love will turn you on
My love will turn you on

I don't think Chris Martin can do that. Whenever he sings about Green Eyes i think - "Gwyneth has green eyes?" Not so with Lennon, it's personal and yet the song never gets bogged down by narrow details of John and Yoko's love affair. John also has this great ability to make domestic love songs. When i heard "in the middle of a shave" for the first time, i thought i misheard the lyrics. But it was just one of those perfect lyrics, that sounds a bit silly but actually speaks volumes.
After the Beatles broke up, John decided to be a stay at home dad and take care of his son, Sean, retiring from music all together. After his time-off from music he re-grouped and began writing again. He commented, once he realized he didn't have to write (he no longer felt the pressure he did while being a "Beatle") the songs began to flow easily. The writing is true, happy, erotic, vulnerable, and (of all things!) domestic. They are unusual and soothing. So although i might no longer subscribe to same world view as John, i'll keep listening to his beautiful songs.

Terry

Lately the only things i have been able to write about have been shoes, music, and silly quizzes that prove - well how easily one can be entertained with generalizations. Anyway, i have been following the actual news but unfortunately it seems i cannot write a coherent post about anything remotely serious. So i'm glad Dead Serious (finally) posted about the Terry Schiavo case, arguing from a medical and legal stand point (not surprisingly i whole heartedly agree - so please go read him and comment there!). The only thing i can add, is that unfortunetely i have experienced a similiar situation that Terry's family finds themselves in. So from that point of view i know how hard it is for the family to let go, but in the end it's not about them but about Terry and ultimettely her wishes should be honored. The only thing i can advise people to do is to take the time and put your beliefs on record, no matter what your life situation is right now. It will be easier for you and your family.
So for now i guess it's a disproportionate trade i'll link to people who have interesting well researched posts while i come dangerously close to posting potty jokes.

I Saw The Sign

Yesterday i ended up downloading the first CD i ever owned/bought - Ace of Base's The Sign on my Nomad. I have to say i'm still enjoying the tacky European disco-esque music, which i haven't listened to in probably five years. Now "All that She Wants" makes a whole lot more sense. I remember as a kid thinking, "She wants another baby? Why, would she want to replace her child? " i was very confused. I also remember choreographing dances to certain songs. Good times.

So what was the first CD you ever bought? And do you still listen to it?

Ooh, Wednesdays Can Be Poetry Days.

CXXVI


The Brain is wider than the sky,
For, put them side by side,
The one the other will include
With ease, and you beside.

The brain is deeper than the sea,
For, hold them, blue to blue,
The one the other will absorb,
As sponges, buckets do.

The brain is just the weight of God,
For, lift them, pound for pound,
And they will differ, if they do,
As syllable from sound.

- Emily Dickinson

Inspired by Ginger's Post

I Don't Think My Exes Would Agree

I know how lame these things are - but i'm at work and things are slow today. Also this seems to imply i'm push over when it comes to relationship. You know the type of girl that imerses herself in every part of her boyfriend's life. Bleh.

Your Seduction Style: Ideal Lover

You seduce people by tapping into their dreams and desires. And because of this sensitivity, you can be the ideal lover for anyone you seek. You are a shapeshifter - bringing romance, adventure, spirituality to relationships. It all depends on who your with, and what their vision of a perfect relationship is.

What Is Your Seduction Style?

Via: Lady Cracker

English Teacher's Pet Peeve Made Funny

Get Fuzzy does it again, for the English geek in me.

Ha!

I guess everyone was up late last night! It could have been a party....

Ace has a hilarious post about a certain jailbait love song love ballad form the 80's. There some meditation on ducks. Priceless.

Wheaton on the other hand is continuing the running gag on the Year of the Cock.

From totally geek, to totally chic!

It seems i can't avoid blogging about Klosterman since everyone i know* has blogged about the greatness that is Klosterman. My love for Chuck goes way back when i "borrowed" Sex, Drugs, And Cocoa Puffs from a friend last year. Then came the Esquire subscription and i was in lit. lust (i mean you can't help like the guy who watched all episodes of Saved by the Bell and The Real World and wrote coherent, funny, and interesting essays on the damn shows.) But this post isn't really about Chuck, this post is about the astute observation he makes about Lloyd Dobbler aka John Cuisack affect. But i have to agree with Karol, i think the girl Chuck describes has long been replaced by a more cynical (and practical) "romantic."

Anyway, as much as i loooved Mr. Cuisack (even as the geek in Sixteen Candles and i even sat through the god-awful Serendipity), Ram (from Consortium) reminds me that in truth my heart blogs belongs to another "heart throb" geek of the eighties. Patrick Dempsey. Seriously i'd do him.

Cuisack has nothing on Dempsey. He has that vulnerability and true geeky cred (that Cuisack never really pulled off). I loved him in Can't Buy Me Loveand in the 90's he didn't become a hipster idol but instead he played disturbing brothers and silly bakery owners. Have you looked into his eyes? Ok, so they are a little bit jumpy but at least he can pull off being crazy and nerdy! I wining combination. So in conclusion i rather take the ambitious soon to be astronomer than Dobbler's boom box any day.

Score:
Cuisack way overrated.
Dempsey crazy and i love it.

*ok, the three bloggers i read on daily basis.

Let The Shoes Do The Talking*

A few weeks ago i got a present of very fashionable pointy toed burgundy high heeled short boots.
The other night while walking back to my car i was accompanied by a very cute (and totally smart) sort of hipster boy (skinny tie and all). Here's a little bit of our conversation:

Me: I'm not much into shoes but i kind of like these.
Him: They're nice.
Me: They kind of make me feel a bit more dangerous. Like there would be no problem with kicking some jerk in the balls with these kind of shoes. I never really liked pointy shoes before i got these. I always thought of them as bitchy shoes. If all shoes had personalities, the pointy shoes would be the "bitches" of the bunch.
He: Ya. But i kind of like that. A hint of bitchness is kind of hot.

Nice guys always complain of women going for the jerks. Well it seems women aren't the only ones attracted to this kind of behavior.

The Shoes:





*Little background: I'm not a fashionable person ( i don't even come close to the fashionistas in my life my sister, Jessica, or Candace). Usually my motto is comfortable and warm over trendy and half-frozen. I don't watch or know the latest trends and when i do notice them i usually stay ten feet away or pout because i like the style before the trendiness and now it seems redundant to wear it. Just to give an example, today i noticed a seven year - old girl with the boots i want. You know the seventies inspired black knee length boots that have been trendy for what seems like forever? Except i never got around to getting them. And now here i am stuck envying a seven year-old for her better sense of fashion and style than me.

Two Photos Are Better Than One (aka I Hate Hello )

They remind me of red hot peppers. Pointy shoes. Watch out.

The Little Things

I just got my long awaited haircut. I had all these grand plans for it. But this morning i woke up and realized i liked my hair length. So i off i went to try to convince the hair stylist to just trim and clean up all the split ends. So now i'm sitting with slightly shorter hair - and even though the hair stylist didn't follow any of the directions i gave, i can't help but feel happy while i run my hands through the silky hair and do my best impression of women in shampoo commercials*. I guess sometimes, you need to learn to take a deep breath and enjoy the perfection of imperfection.

*Photos might be forthcoming.

Guess What I'm Wearing Today

First Happy St. Patrick's Day to all the Irish people or anyone who needs a good any execuse to drink lots of beer. There must be something in the water or all the socializing i've been doing with people of Irish decent but today without realizing it's St. Patrick's Day i wore a green shirt. I have to say i look pretty good in green. So here's to soda bread, green beer, and tacky shirts that proclaim your heritage!

Klutzy McKlutz

Ever since i can remember i've been stumbling into things, spilling various liquids (on myself), and generally screwing shit up. It seems like walls and other inanimate objects like to jump out at me ever so often and beat the crap out of me. At any given time i have at least four or five mysterious bruises on my body. Just in the last two days i walked into two walls and a very sharp corner of the table stand. Now as i'm typing i feel a faint pang of pain in my left thigh where the sharp corner i encountered earlier tonight has created a bruise the size of a tiny country off the coast of Africa. I have stubbed (and broken) toes on multiple occasions. It's inevitable that if i think i can fit through a space i usually can't. This tendency has caused me to put my ass in places where it's not been welcomed either by the other party or me - places like restaurants, airplanes, trains or any other space where maneuvering under grace and poise is required - has found my ass in contact with (most likely) some old lady's face. And here i thought i was getting better at this whole non-graceful movement but alas with two more new bruises added today i don't think this is the case.

Aaargh!

How cool would this bear be for my mascot?

Just Pondering

Is it me or does Madonna look more and more like a alien? A Kaballah possessed alien for that matter.

How To Be Pretentious Without Really Trying.

As i was taking a leisurely walk in NYC, i came across this little gem. I never understood the appeal of vanity plates, why would you want people to recognize your car and some stupid aspect of your personality/life from a license plate? But as a friend pointed out, the other night, wouldn't it be a better chick magnet if it read "Well Hung?"Practically the same effect.

Seriously, WTF?

Gib at Crosblog has a good summary of the outcome in the double-murder of Judge Joan Lefkow 's husband and mother. But it seems like there is more bad news, today in Georgia, a Superior Court Judge Rowland Barnes and two other people were shot dead by a defendant in a rape case the judge was presiding over. Is this going to turn into another Columbine like phenomena? Where disturbed assholes attempting copy-cat vigilante justice?

Worst. Day. Ever. This Week.

I hate being as sensitive as i am. Today i spent ninety percent of my time making useless crap while the person i work with (not even my f. boss!) stood over me and commented on my slow progress and failure (and making me feel even more of a failure for things i have no control over). If i was in NYC i'd be heading over to the Overlook Lounge to see my favorite girl bartend and to get drunk unwind after this miserable waste of a day. I need to go find something to punch. Toodles.

One Step Forward, One Step Back

Because i'm still at work (and still lazy) i don't have anything worthwile to contribute about the changes happening in the Middle East. Although it's very exciting what's going on, there are still a lot of flaws and setbacks even in the "victories." So, basically this is a link post to The Protocols of the Yuppies of Zion commentary on Daniel Pipes' article.

How Did I Get Here?

This is one of those stupified moments, where you have been starring at the computer for four straight hours and you realize you clicked on a semi-sexy picture of Katie Holmes (and you don't even fancy girls) with Russian words in the background. And you read the equivalent of Your Secret Sex Cycle in Russian! And your realize it's time to put down the mouse and step away from the computer.

International Women's Day

If i was living back in Russia i would be buying my Mommy some yellow daffodils. And i would also be getting a few flowers thrown my way (you know, from all the potential lover boys i left in the mother country.) Anyway, just a small reminder to do something nice for the special woman in your life. Especially your mom. Because as Meg Ryan so eloquently put it in French Kiss, "Everyone loves their mother, even people who say they hate their mothers, love them." (Yes, i like that movie and no, i'm not ashamed. )

Incidently, it's exactly a month till my birthday, just thought i give a heads up.

Musical Interlude *

I'm listening to In The Morning Of The Magician (you can listen to the whole album on their website) by The Flaming Lips. And there is a moment (actually at 5:04 sec) in the song which makes me feel like i'm floating through some kind of inexplicable ether of happiness and goodness. This is the kind of feeling i imagine i would have while on a good acid trip. That's a pretty good feeling to get while sitting in a fluorescent lit room editing yet another annoying image.

On another random note i love these lyrics from Ego Tripping At The Gates OF Hell:

I was wanting you to love me
But your love it never came.
All the other love around me
Was just wasting all away.

It sums the sentiment so well. There so many other good lyrics / songs on this album.

*I realize that blogging about this album is a bit redundant., since everyone including your grandma has heard this album. Oh well.

The Lazy Streak Continues

And they say people are not aware of blogs. Well, depends on the people.

Forplay Political Style

Because i'm too damn lazy to post anything of my own i'll link to Gib, who like other dirty minded bloggers, is using the revolution in Lebanon for his own pleasure (displeasure?). Anyway it made me laugh on a Friday morning and for a simple girl like me, that's all you need.

Don't Mind Me While I Roll My Eyes

Seriously this product is nausea inducing. I all for love-dovey what have you. But this crosses the line.

Memories In Wrinkles

One of my favorite things to do with my grandfather when i was a young child was to slide my little hand over his brow. It was no ordinary forehead, it resembled an old-fashioned washing board, especially when he arched his eyebrows. My mother's father was a quiet man, often dominated by his wife, so it was lovely for me to connect to him in this little game. I loved the feel of the grooves his forehead produced and he was one of very few people who's company i enjoyed without any pressure to speak. So there we be, a strange pair, a little girl sitting next to an elderly man, tracing the grooves of his forehead. Even when i grew up, i would sometimes touch his forehead and he always complied in making the wrinkles stand out.

In my family we have come to the consensus that overall the look of my sister and i fall towards my father's side. Yet the other day i was sitting opposite my Mother and happened to arch my eyebrows.

"Look at those lines on your forehead. I think it might be time to start taking care of your skin better."
"You mean anti-wrinkle cream?! But i'm in my early twenties!" I said indignantly.

But in the back of my mind it was kind of nice to know there was a little bit of my grandfather in me. And all i had to do was lift my eyebrows and run my hand down my brow to remember how wonderful it was to have such a loving person in my life.

A Feminist, A Scientist, And A Priest

walk into a bar. End of joke, check out the cartoon. (Maybe someone should put this as a sticker on the Dover, PA textbooks!)

Complicated Or Confused?

Overheard on the T:
A boy and girl in their early teens discussing (what else?) themselves:

A little bit chubby (in that cute way) guy with a Jewfro: "I'm so complicated!"
Girl: "I know!"
Jewfro: "I mean, i'm not complicated. I'm confused."

But, aren't we all?

To Blog, Is To Rant or The MBTA Can Suck It

I'm so tired, I haven't slept a wink,
I'm so tired, my mind is on the brink.

It's been snowing here in Boston. I usually like snow, but relying on public transportation and the lack of sleep have left me a tad frustrated with the whole winterlandhell.
For example, today i got on the Commuter Rail with a big gym bag and bulky coat on. There were only two person seats left open so i sat down in one of them and promptly fell asleep. So basically a seat that in theory should accommodate two people ends up accommodating one and a half. Somewhere in middle of my journey, a woman and and a man entered the compartment and proceeded to talk loudly in really annoying sounding French. Which i later realized was Italian. To add to the annoyance level the woman had a purple panther print backpack and frizzy hair (Yes, i'm feeling snarky this morning). There were no more open seats and they stood talking over me, waiting for me to wake up and move a a few inches. Which i did. The frustrating woman sat next to me and her husband sat behind her. I tried not to take it personally. But it's hard when you get woken up just to be squashed and then the person who squeezed you proceeds to talk in loud and obnoxious tone to a person behind her causing you to not be able to fall back asleep. I was not pleased.
This has been a week where the MBTA has (for a lack of better term) sucked:
On Monday, i waited for the train fifteen minutes in the frigid cold, which wouldn't be that bad except the train i was on decided half-way to stop and derail and then turn around and go the other way. Which left me to wait for another train for fifteen minutes in damn cold.
On Tuesday, the commuter rail that i take decided to skip my stop, randomly and then i had to take the T back to my actual stop.
End of rant.
Update: I'm wide awake. Maybe i'll actually accomplish something today.

Look The Other Way And Leave

I had the good fortune this autumn to visit Amsterdam and ride around the surrounding countryside. I saw beautiful flat landscapes, quiet creeks, old wind mills and sheep with different colors painted on their butts. Here was the Holland i read about from books and seen in paintings. But apparently The Netherlands are changing. With the murders of prominent politicians and movie makers unafraid to criticize and speak openly about their views of the new immigrants. The Protocols of the Yuppies of Zion had an excellent post on the phenomena of middle class Dutch leaving the country for Australia and France. Kudos to them for reporting on the story a few days before the NYT.

For better analysis and more coherent post check out Dead Serious and the New Vintage.

Filmmakers Lack Depth In Pornography Study

Loved this headlines (Depth and Pornography in one headline)! But seriously, i thought the article was thought provoking. I have complained before about the portrayal of sex in American films before (juvenile, plastic, and unrealistic for the most part). Although this article deals with a different angle of sexuality portrayed on screen. It criticizes both the glorification and demonizing of porn, using "Deep Throat" as an example.

To which i say: Get thee some Radley Metzger people!

What She Said!

Here's what one of my favorite people in the world wrote answering the question i posed a few days ago:
I like pansies. Ha ha, I just said I liked pansies. No, for serious. I really do.Lately, on myself I've been liking the back of my arm, like on my tricep. But I like feeling other people's backs. Yay for sexual questions, Petitedov. Way to go. My favorite flower is the orchid and my favorite body part is the vagina. Hi, I'm Georgia O'Keefe.