The reason why I started this (somewhat) embarrassing post is because I felt like a) doctors don't warn about the side effect of a lowered sex drive when taking the pill 2) most women I talked to, saw the pill as their only choice.
When I realized the pill wasn't a good match for me, I started looking around for other options. Of course there was the condom. But no one I know, feels great JUST using a condom. There's just too many ways to screw it up. And while we are talking about condoms can I just say to all the women out there who sing the praises of condoms: Do you really like the way a condom feels? Honestly? Because I hate condoms and I don't understand how other women like it. As for men, let's be honest, I have never heard a man say a good thing about a condom, unless he was on tv and being paid. Don't get me wrong, condoms are important and I would never encourage sex without condoms if you aren't in a long-lasting, trusting, monogamous relationship but COME ON (a la GOB from Arrested Development) condoms are just not as fun as your Sex Ed teacher made them out. For once I would like someone on tv say how much condoms suck and then not die of syphallis & AIDS by the end of the show.
Moving on, there were several other contraceptive methods to look into. Most of the choices like the Depo-Provera shot and (certain IUDs) had the same disadvantage as the pill, the would alter my hormone levels, something I did not want. Also, the IUD are typically recommended for women who have had children, being childless I didn't want to risk my future fertility with a copper IUD (one which does not alter hormone levels). There was just one last choice - the diaphragm. When I mentioned it to my doctor, she tried to dissuade me away from the diaphragm and offered, again, the pill. It was frustrating to say the least. The reasoning was that I was young and my life style didn't fit the diaphragm demographic (according to her). It took me going to a different doctor to finally get the prescription I wanted and needed. Guess what I loved it. Yes it's a little more work for the woman, but giving my other choices I prefer the diaphragm.
The diaphragm is not ideal - but it seems like not enough women know about it or trust it. It does take some planning if you don't want to interrupt having sex, but if you are willing to interrupt sex for putting on a condom, this is pretty comparable. Also, if you know you want to have sex you can completely plan for it before hand. If you are curious about the diaphragm, the first place to start is by trying out the sponge method (Elaine!). I know it's not for everyone but if some of you are looking for alternatives, diaphragm is a good start.
P.S. Pearatty has mentioned in the comment section that it might be the specific birth control pill that is making women have a lower sex drive and that like everything you have to try different ones to get the right one for you. This is definitely an option for some,(I tried four different ones before I gave up) but it wasn't an option for me. I still continue to hate the pill.
Okay, now end the PSA posts!